Local tourney

Ok...so I decide to take in a live tourney....Well I am totally fricken hammered as I write this so excuse the spelling or grammer errors. Anyways so I show up at this local tourney to raise funds for this local hockey team or something. First prize is sposed to be a grand however only like 20 people show up so this is obviously not feasible. Anyways...whatever the prize is we get down to business and yes I am card dead absolutely throughout the tourney. Unfrickenbelieveable, you would think the donks have learned how to play with all of the poker on tv and such but really it has just gotten worse. I got a guy to my right going all in on an A-2s with nothing on the board that resembles anything which would represent a hand. I almost laughed out loud seriously. Not to make light of a situation here but the guy that raised it all in actually had top pair with a pair of fours (five kicker! and self-proclaimed open ended straight draw!). I spent the night trying to accomplish a real goal of getting hammered which I succeeded!!! Because seriously I had 2 hands all night, a "wired" pair of threes (as Van Patten would put it) and A-8 which I ran into my buddy (who only raised like 1.15 times the blinds on the button) with pocket aces. Yeah thanks bud I think you will be picking up my fricken tab for the night you mofo. But really at that point it was trivial I was drunk, my other friends were looking like they were having more fun than me at the "out" table and I had less chips than the guy that was outside playing guitar.
Funniest hand I ever saw....
You will not believe this at all.
Ok I am drunk, I cant remember the exact flop so I will embellish. Four guys in the pot..One guy raises, two guys fold. flop comes 6h-3s-qc.
ok, one guy bets other guy calls.
turn is 6h
WTF??? (and I actually said that before anybody out loud!!!)
TWO SIX OF HEARTS!!!!
Ok I know I am card dead thus far but this is ridiculous. We look at the cards and there is an extra six of hearts in a brand new deck of cards. Obviously the braniacs that were running the tourney didn't bother to count or match up the cards. Needless to say this was the only entertainment of the night other than the couple making out on the dance floor later on in the night at the second place we ended up at.
I have a friend that looks like eddie the eagle from the muppets and actually that is what I call him. He is great and bought me a few drinks which I appreciated. The only problem with the guy is that he has three stages of drunkeness. First it is the normal drunk guy, who turns into the fun drunk guy (like me all night) then he turns into the loud funny but pick a fight guy which I feel I have to defend (well I am the biggest of my group). But to tell you the truth the drinks were worth it tonight.
Well signing off for tonight man it is fricken hard to type when you are hammered. I have a real problem remembering anything the next day so needless to say this will be news to me tomorrow.